Country Club Jerks
by Concentration Maple-ation
Summary: Johnny's bike is confiscated by the Preppies' new Country Club, and it's up to Lefty and Vance to get it back. [Regular Show reference...]


**A/N: Okay I just couldn't resist. The previews made me think of the Preps (I thought especially of Gord when Roger said "They totally fell for it".) I mean really. This has to be the best crossover type thing ever, rite? **XD

**Extra points if you can guess who each character represents! ;D**

**ANYways I hope you enjoyed! This was fun to write even though it took a while...**

* * *

Vance Medici sighed loudly as he kneeled down to the bumpy cement, trowel in hand and scowl on face. Just the one time he hadn't done anything wrong, he'd been punished, and there he was planting flowers along the sidewalk. What use would it be? They'd just be dug up again anyways. He could have been riding his bike around town, he could have been picking up chicks (or dudes) with his awesome hair...

Lefty Mancini glanced up at Vance's groans and grunts of complaint. He wanted to complain too, but he wanted to get out of doing the dirty work asap. Seth Kolbe was giving the redhead a disapproving look and that possibly meant even more work for them.

"Shut up," he finally hissed, ripping his trowel out of the dirt and flinging earth on the other Greaser. "You wanna be here any longer?"

The flaming redhead shook the dirt out of his hair and smoothed it back, giving one last sigh before he was quiet.

The job took a lot longer than they expected, since quite a few teenagers came by and stomped the flowers out of place. At one point, Seth had walked off and the two boys were alone and almost finished. But as Vance turned to get another plant, he saw something out of the corner of his eye.

"Hundred... dollar... bill!" The Greaser leaped up, dropping his trowel on the way to nab the bill. He grasped it, but it fluttered out of his hands. "Huh?"

Lefty stared after him, eyebrows knit together and eyes wide. He watched his friend run after the dollar, which was flying away just fast enough so Vance couldn't catch it.

Lefty came up beside Vance on his bike, motioning him with his head to hop on, and he complied, settling on to the handlebars. They followed the bill finally to the arch of the Harrington house, which strangely had a gate separating them from the other parts of campus, chuckling Preppies surrounding the bill. Derby Harrington smirked darkly as he ripped the hundred dollar bill from the hook.

"They totally fell for it!" Gord Vendome laughed, earning more chuckles from the other Preps.

"Hey! That's not cool!" Vance stomped and shook the metal of the bars.

Lefty mumbled something under his breath and took a few steps back, speeding forward and ramming the gate with his bike. The Preps seemed almost unimpressed. Bif Tremblay finally decided to open the gate and shake lefty off of his bike, tossing it behind him and locking up again.

"That's my bike!" Lefty yelled after him, rubbing his head from his tumble to the ground. "Give it back!"

Vance moved over to mumble something to Lefty. "That's Johnny's bike, remember?"

"Ah, shit," Lefty growled and stood up. "C'mon, Johnny's gonna kill us, just give it back!"

Derby Harrington raised an eyebrow. Bif crossed his arms. Gord set an arm on the shoulder of Parker Ogilvie. "Now," Derby paused to laugh, "why would we go and stoop so low to do that? Besides, it will be destroyed tonight at our Summer Solstice event!"

The Preps continued to chuckle in their condescending tones even as they walked off.

Vance groaned and ran his hands through his hair several times. What were they gonna do now? The Preps stole Johnny Vincent's bike that, technically, Lefty stole in the first place. Johnny would be so pissed at them, one, for falling for a Prep's tricks, and two, for getting his bike stolen. They were Greasers, they couldn't just go and buy a new one.

"...Johnny's gonna kill us when he finds out..." Vance sighed, slumping to the ground next to his friend in defeat.

"He's not gonna find out."

* * *

"Guys, we need your help."

"What's up?"

"You can't be goin' an' tellin' Johnny, but... Those damn Preppies stole Johnny's bike and we need help gettin' it back."

Norton Williams, Peanut Romano, Lucky De Luca, Ricky Pucino, and Hal Esposito stared silently at the two when they had suddenly rushed into the auto shop. No one spoke, no one moved. After what seemed like forever, the five Greasers went back to whatever they were doing with faces of innocence.

"Oh, c'mon, we need to get Johnny's bike back before he gets 'ere. He can't know or we're dead!"

Norton spoke up. "Ever since they've started up that 'Country Club' crap, they've been stealing shit from us like crazy. There ain't no way we can get it all back, Vance, sorry to break it ta ya."

"But-!"

"No. Can. Do."

Both Vance and Lefty sighed heavily. "Just... make sure Johnny doesn't know 'bout it, kay?"

"Got it."

* * *

It was hard to come across, but the two teenagers found something decent enough to sneak in to the Harrington house and look like someone of high standards. Lefty instructed Vance to blend in, and once they were inside they immediately noticed massive amounts of people clicking their glasses together, and they immediately copied. With air glasses, of course.

They kept to the shadows until they saw a toilet sitting in the middle of the room. Vance stared before he followed Lefty into the room following it.

Inside were toilets... Dozens and dozens of toilets.

Why did Derby have so many toilets?

There was a Mona Lisa toilet, a couch toilet, a TV toilet, a skirt toilet, a lampshade toilet... All kinds of toilets.

"What's with all the toilets?" Lefty mumbled, peering around the massive room.

When the two heard approaching footsteps and the doorknob behind them jiggle, they took cover behind one of the toilets. They heard Bif and Parker talking about voices and imagination, then they heard their footsteps fade and the door close. As soon as the breathed a sigh of relief, a cloth was covering their mouths and everything went black.

* * *

"Alright, what's goin' on? I know somethin's up. Where'd my bike go? I know you know! ...Peanut?"

"Um..."

An awkward silence filled the air. Peanut tugged at his jacket, Ricky fiddled with the cigarette behind his ear. No one looked at Johnny Vincent. Anyone who dared look in his enraged eyes was going to catch fire and burn alive.

"Alright, I'll tell ya... but you're not gonna like it."

* * *

When they awoke, it was near dark and they were tied to an uncomfortable surface. Derby was smirking in front of them with the same group of Preps he had before.

"Awake, are you?"

"Let us go! Give us the bike back!"

More condescending chuckles. They were really getting on the Greasers' nerves. That wasn't something to chuckle at!

"Oh, you'll see the bike again... But not before we make some improvements."

"Improvements...?"

"We're gonna turn it into a toilet of course!"

Lefty glanced at Vance. A toilet? What the hell?

"Oh, you just wouldn't understand," Derby smirked. "As rich people, it is our role in life to turn everything into toilets."

"The hell?" Vance mumbled, casting a weird look towards the Preppies. "That doesn't even make any sense!"

"Yeah, and you already have a ton of toilets!"

"As I said, you would never understand. You're not rich like us."

"Not rich at all!" Pinky Gauthier finally piped up, a smug expression almost permanent on her face.

"Good one, darling." Derby clicked glasses with her and turned his head to give her lips a quick peck.

"This occasion is special, however," the blonde continued. "This time, we're going to launch it into space!"

Lefty squinted in disbelief. Seriously? Turning a bike into a toilet and launching it into space? Was he dreaming?

A few moments after Derby spoke of the toilet launching, a huge machine was brought up out of the pond near the house. Another machine took place next to Derby and the other Preps. Finally, Johnny's bike was brought out and put inside the machine.

"You can't do this!" Vance struggled against his binds fiercely. Lefty still couldn't believe what was happening and was in shock, therefore he had no room to really react.

Bif and Parker stepped forward and punched the two Greasers square in the jaw, and put duct tape over their mouths.

"I know, we should turn _them _into toilets and shoot _t__hem_ into space!" Gord spoke, a gleam in his eye.

"Good idea Gord," Derby praised the shorter male.

All of a sudden, a clamor of voices sounded out from behind the gate, and in a flash 6 Greasers barreled through. They skid to a halt beside their friends, earning several gasps from the rich people. Even Derby was surprised.

"Why the hell didn'tya tell me they stole my bike? They've been stealin' stuff from us for too long!" It was Johnny who spoke first, his back hunched from what was most likely anger. Shouts of encouragement rang out behind him. "Not this time... Not everyone can go and buy a new bike when they wanna! It's time we take back what's ours!"

"That may be a bit difficult," the blonde regained his attitude. "Seeing as how you're not rich!"

The blonde Prep's smirk didn't falter as he pulled out something from his sweater vest and aimed it at the Greasers. When the surrounding people noticed it was a shiny, golden gun, they all gasped deeply and fled the scene so that only Derby was against the complete crew of Greaser boys.

Lefty and Vance's protests were muffled due to the duct tape, and the other 6 soon wore faces of shock as he cocked the gun.

"Bring in the cavalry!" Derby aimed the gun to the sky and shot as he commanded.

As horses galloped through the grounds, Peanut tore off the duct tape and Hal cut the ropes.

"Look out!" Lefty called, the horses running at them quicker.

Hal attempted to run, but he wasn't fast enough. He was trampled.

However, Left and Vance were safe as they crouched down. They decided to quickly grab Johnny's bike from the toilet making machine. Unluckily, Derby was standing right in front of it.

"Shouldn't a messed with us!" Lefty made a swift punch to the side of the blonde's head, but there was no reaction.

"Let me do it," Vance patted his friend's arm shortly. He then made to punch Derby several more times.

The Prep only giggled. "I've had 67 face lifts! I don't feel a thing!" He grabbed Lefty and Vance by their faces. "And tiger tendons implanted in my hands. I can mess with whoever I please!"

Meanwhile, Peanut was nearly done for if Johnny hadn't gotten in the way of the jockey's weapon, warning him that Peanut was his right hand man, and being kicked down as he was distracted.

Norton saved Ricky from an oncoming horse, and doused several jockeys with water from a nearby pipe. Out of the pond came more people, and they got Norton cornered and away from the pipe.

Out of nowhere, tennis balls rained down from above. Peanut, Hal, and Lucky searched for the source and noticed Justin Vandervelde on the roof. The three Greasers climbed the wall, yet lost Peanut on the way.

Lefty and Vance had a difficult time multitasking, keeping the bike from going through the toilet maker while beating up Derby. The blonde proclaimed that the bike will go through no matter what.

As Derby pinned the two to the bottom of the machine, Lefty noticed a walkie talkie. He picked it up hastily and told Hal to stall the machine.

Hal nodded, taking off his jacket and throwing it in the face of Justin. The Prep fell off the roof in a rush to escape the horrible stench of Hal's jacket. Lucky motioned to shoot at the air tank Parker had, thus resulting in Parker shooting upward to block the satellite for the machine. Vance and Lefty rolled to their respective sides and the bike fell on Derby.

The two Greasers rushed to move the bike out of the machine.

"You can't stop the machine! Do you know how much this thing costs?"

Soon enough, Parker fell from the satellite and the toilet maker was working again. Derby ran forward to grab the bike. The two Greasers moved forward, and Derby entered through the maker, shifting and shaping into a toilet.

The new Derby toilet moved along on the conveyor belt and landed in the space shuttle. Everyone watched as the shuttle flew off into space.

Soon, then police arrived and the Greasers took all of the stuff that was stolen from them. Sadly, they were all in toilet form, but that didn't quite matter to them.

"Thanks for comin' and helpin' us out there, guys."

"No problem. I'm just happy ya stood up to the jerks and got all a our things back." Johnny gave them a small smile, a genuine smile. Luckily, he didn't notice Peanut sneaking a Lola toilet with the rest of the stuff.

"...Ya think he'll survive up there?" Vance asked, scratching his flaming head as he looked up to the night sky.

"Probably, I mean," Lefty paused. "He's rich!"

The two Greasers mocked the condescending chuckles that annoyed the crap out of them before, but at that time, it sounded right.


End file.
